Dhvani-Explained: What is Alimony?

By Sayali

You’ve probably heard this word in a TV show or read it in the news recently. A couple splits up and enters the word ‘alimony'

But what is alimony? Is it handing someone cash after a break up? Is it unfair? Is it unfair to men?

If you want to know, you're in the right place, because alimony is about a lot more than just money. It's about freedom and safety.

Alimony (also known as ‘spousal support) is financial help that one partner gives to the other after a divorce or separation

It’s not punishment.

It’s not “winning” or “losing.”

It's a way to make sure both people can move forward (not just the one who gets the cheque)

Let's start with the big question: “Why is Alimony even necessary?”

Because marriage often includes sacrifices (not all of them are visible on paper)

One partner may:

Give up job opportunities

Move away from family

Pause education

Focus entirely on unpaid, domestic labour

So, if a relationship ends, that partner shouldn’t be left behind. Alimony steps in to support financial stability, especially when someone has:

A career gap

Limited savings

No immediate way to earn the same level of income

One of the most important parts. Many people stay in violent, manipulative or emotionally abusive relationships simply because they can't afford to leave. They fear:

“Where will I go?”

“How will I survive?”

“How will I afford hygiene, childcare? How will I get a job?”

Alimony can provide a temporary safety net. Enough for someone to escape, heal and start fresh. Without alimony, divorce or separation would become a privilege. 

And I would like to be clear: this can happen to anyone, regardless of gender

Let’s start with a simple example:

Neha and Ayush have been married for 10 years. During the marriage, Ayush worked a full time job, whereas Neha quit her career to manage their family. 

Now, they're getting divorced.

Ayush has income, experience, and a strong resume. He’ll likely have no financial issues during and after the divorce. On the other hand, Neha hasn’t worked in years. She has a huge gap on her resume, no current income, outdated technical skills and rejoining the workforce is no easy feat. Plus, over the last 10 years, she's gotten used to a certain quality of life that she may not be able to continue to support for herself (and possibly their children) with her reduced income.

In this case, a court might say “Ayush, you need to pay Neha alimony for a few years so she can get back on her feet.”

Now another question that may strike you is “Does this mean that men always pay?”

Not always

Alimony is gender neutral in the law. That means anyone, regardless of gender, can pay or receive alimony, depending on who earns more and who needs support.

BUT- in most cases, it is the man paying the woman.

Why? Because of patriarchal norms:

Men are expected to be breadwinners

Women are expected to pause their careers

Society undervalues unpaid labour like housework and childcare

So even though the law doesn’t discriminate, our society still does, and alimony often reflects that imbalance.

(I could go on and on as to how the patriarchy impacts other factors of life but that's a whole other conversation)

Now the big question, “Why should you care”?

Because regardless of your marital status and age, you deserve to know your rights (current and future),how society treats emotional labour, economic power, and gender roles.

Knowing this stuff helps you make better decisions, for yourself and the people around you.

Did you get a better understanding of alimony? Let us know in the comments. Share your point of view in the comments. Start a conversation, because at the end of the day that's what Project Dhvani is about. Starting conversation about inclusion, empowerment and expression.