Living it all again

Stuti Ghoshal 

I want to be a child again

The ability to perceive life innocently

Somehow slipped away so quickly,

The languid Sunday mornings,

the notorious evenings that echoed with laughter

All are now tucked away in a safe treasure box somewhere inside my being.

I stood in my driveway for forty minutes today,

Contemplating my very being of existence

I couldn't choose between the house in front of me or the road behind me

I stood there rethinking all my life's decision and how they've shaped me today,

I stood there to simply stop the feeling of time taking away fragments of my present to piece together a future I wish to be never a part of.

This 'house' was not my home, it could never be,

It has absolutely no sense of familiarity

no desperation of going back home ever occurs inside me,

Which seems to be a common case nowadays,

Nothing I have which i can call mine

Except that one blue suitcase, where lay all my sweaters and jackets

Once so close to me and beloved.

Time is a fickle thing,

you see'Cause I'd give up forever just to be a fool and be carefree

I'd give up forever just to taste it

The sweetness of being a kid,

Not having to taste the bitterness of growing up again

The fractious nature of the clothes we'd wear

And the games we would play

Who knew it was the last time we would be experiencing that kind of joy again...

Before I die

I want to relive my moments of ecstasy,

I want to relive the world where my monsters can't find me

Explore the places I used to go hide and spend there, the rest of my life.

I want to be a child again

Perceive life again

Not let it slip through my fingers

Not let it those glorious days simply become memories which will forever linger

No, I wish to be a child again andI shall wish it till my dying day.